Chilled!!

Chill how?

How? How would I? Gulping chunks of ices surely not a good idea. The bitterness, screams and tears that congeal into hatred; these are what I must swallow. Down the throat. Taken for granted. I just hate it. I am infuriated. Totally.

Who? No one. I was yelling at myself. Actually, that’s because Abg Alwi said always put the responsibility (or rather blame) on yourself first. Alright. I did. No I didn’t. It seems so difficult to control the battle between the evil and the bright sides of me. I thought life would have made me stronger and tougher-no I am even more sensitive, instead.

I am not a girl. I am not a boy. Neither in between. I am a guy!! I have grown up! I know what to do. I must pick and choose. There are many things I have got to give. To lose and give in. Farewell to them. I am moving on. So you think I am scared? So you think you are God? Think.. oh no, think again..

Sally has got herself alone. So has I. Do I care? Yes, absolutely I do. Screwing up everything is always not a choice. It should have been avoided. Life and its lessons let me know who are liars and who are not. Who are hypocrites and who proves that sincerity is what he/she really lives with. Hypocrite!! Hate you fellas!! Well, hate yourself la Aleng!! Grr~

Right. Fair enough. Life and all its contents, and their pairs. Men and women; black and white; true and false; nice and cruel; long and short; smart and retarded: hot and chill; you name it! Pairing up and then emerge with purpose. One, defines the other..

Happy and sad. What today has got to teach about tomorrow? And what tomorrow has got to say about yesterday? It says you will understand the word gain once you experience the word loss. You learn to feel the fury of hatred once you got the chance to love and to be loved. You fathom how easy it is to be black once you painted your way with whitish snow. You have got to understand what happiness brings once you live in bitterness and misery. And you appreciate life if you really know why death exists. Have you got what it means?

It means forget about all these and go do something else. Something better. Sally has got to be alone. She cried of her own choice. Don’t cry over a spilt milk. Unless you spill it when Maghrib is near.

Go prepare your meal. And enjoy breakfast with family and friends. Allah knows what you are doing. Take care Aleng..

_______________________________________________

Sally Sendiri (The Lonely Sally)
By: Peter Pan


Bila Sally mencariku
Biarkan dia terbang jauh
Dalam hatinya hanya Satu
Jauh hatinya hanyaku

Katakan ku takkan datang
Pastikan ku takkan kembali
Lalu biarkan dia menangis
Lalu biarkan dia pergi

Sally kau selalu sendiri
Sampai kapan pun sendiri
Hingga kau lelah menanti
Hingga kau lelah menangis

Thank you Faris for keeping me company..